Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Weight Watchers Redux

Last week I was reaching for a cotton pad in a glass jar in my bathroom (I know, sounds like TMI but it's not) and my hand got stuck in the jar. So I opened my fist and took it out of the jar. The experience made me think of a documentary I saw once about finding water in an arid area, I think in Africa, using monkeys. It's done by putting something attractive in a jar with a small mouth. The monkey reaches in, closes its fist over the treat, then can't pull its hand back out. Monkeys apparently won't let go once they have something tasty, even though it traps them. Eventually the monkey gets thirsty and seeks out water - the trapper follows and voila. I can't remember if they released the monkey eventually but I hope so. Trapped by greed and the inability to let go would be a horrible way to die.

It struck me that I am like the monkey with its hand stuck in the jar. This made me think about being fat, spending too much money, grabbing everything there is to have and never letting go. I want it all, even though having it has trapped me in a fat body, in poor health, in debt, in dissatisfaction. So I decided that I need to open my hand and let go of all the things I think I want and only take the things I truly need. Sounds so simple, but I know it will be a struggle.

My friend at work inspired me to join WW again - she did and is having great success. I'm hoping that this time around I will learn to enjoy having just a little bit and that I can apply that to other areas of my life. Eat less, buy less, want less, but treat myself better. The only things I'll be having more of are exercising and taking care of my family and myself. We'll see.

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